Thursday, September 12, 2013

Not a fan of "baby steps"

As many of you know,  I am not renown for my patience. When I decide to do something, I want to do it RIGHT NOW!  And not only that, I expect to be able to complete any new task or skill flawlessly the first time out.  If it's worth doing, it's worth doing right. Right?
When planning my retirement activities, I decided that improving my general fitness was a necessary goal.  I want to be one of those scrawny, bird-like old ladies, not one of the "doughy" ones.
 John and I "do" 5k's occasionally and especially like to participate in the ones sponsored by Rarh Brewery because there is beer at the finish line.  We get lots of encouragement and congratulations on Facebook but what our "friends" do not realize is that we walk those 5k's....not one single step is remotely close to a jog.  We walk briskly enough to break a sweat but not fast enough that gasping for breath is an issue.  I decided that I would like to change that...I would like to actually run part of the Rahr Oktoberfest 5k coming up at the end of the month.  I even have a goal time in mind.
"Training" for this on my own would be a useless idea because I really don't like to run.  If grizzlies or zombies begin to chase me, we all know how those scenarios will end.  I just don't run.  So, with good intentions, I signed up for the Couch to 5K class at the local Y.  I went out and got new, real running shoes at the local running store to insure a good fit.  (They aren't cute but they are comfy.)  I knew that the class was in danger of not "making" but I went to the first class confident that enough beginning runners would show up and the Y would be so inspired by the desires of these obviously non-runners that the class would be held regardless of enrollment.  My class is led by a perky (and scrawny) woman with a BMI of 0 and includes "Runner Girl" who regularly runs two miles a day and wants to work on her form (wth?), "Mr. Mom" who is seriously concerned about injuries and 1chubby, waddler, Me.  The first day we spent most of the class talking about shoes, clothes and how to tell a real injury from just a twinge.  (This did not reassure "Mr. Mom".)  Then we went out for our first run....the plan was a brisk 5 minute walk, a 2 minute jog and a 5 minute walk.  OK...I can do this.  I walk on the treadmill regularly.  Surely I can slip in a 2 minute jog with no this rate, I will be running that entire 5k that is held on Thanksgiving Day.  Not so much...I ran all of 90 seconds...that's right...a minute and a half.  Thought I was dieing!  And you do not want to know how long it took me to breathe normally after those endless 90 seconds.  I was appalled! 
I thought about quitting but those two need me to come back if the class is going to continue. (The Y does not seem inspired by just 3 of us.) was day two. Same plan 5-2-5.  "Runner girl" wants help with her breathing.  "Mr. Mom" was late but caught up in no time.  And the waddler?  I managed to run for 1 minute and 45 seconds. Now my walking buddy LD (whose ringtone on my phone is "Yell, yeah I like beer) is excited about my "improvement".  Improvement?  At this rate I will be lucky if I can complete a running 5k by my 80th birthday!  I am constantly being told about "baby steps" and I just don't "do" baby steps.  I want to run like the wind and I want to do it right now.....or Saturday which is my next training day. (A 5-3-5 can I run 3 minutes when I cannot run 2 yet?)
So what is the point of today's rambling, blog (other than to entertain you with mental images of my waddling body attempting to run and breathe at the same time)?  I guess I am going to be forced to learn patience at this late date in my life.  I must embrace the concept of baby steps.  Either that, or redefine my goal.  I really don't want to be one of those "doughy" old ladies so I guess I will be learning to be satisfied with baby steps.  You have no idea how much I hate that...almost as much as I hate running!


  1. This was so entertaining! LOL I identified with every word. Even as a skinny kid I don't recall thinking running was ever a good or necessary thing. You are definitely inspiring, beer and all. :) Diana

  2. I admire the fact that you are willing to try something you find really hard. I am also impressed that you can identify why it is your inclination to give up if you are not good at something right away and yet you are still willing to "embrace baby steps." I can really relate to this. It is the reason I have had a lifelong aversion to participating in sports. I hate the part where you are still learning and making lots of mistakes. Add a team sport and you are affecting a lot of people when you aren't a good player - yet. Strangely, the only thing I liked as a younger person was running - but I was never a "runner" like people are now. Of course when we were young, people didn't just jog around a lot for fun or run 5Ks like they do now. So you do what you can do. You are still miles ahead of this girl, who is still sitting on the couch. Keep on trucking, Judith, one step at a time.